Wet November

All along November, days are spent inside the house, watching the ceiling and wondering whether it will come crashing soon. Apart from that, this month is the ONLY month that I can sleep with a comforter. It's the coolest month of the year and I like and hate it.

Hate it for the damage it caused. My mom's car garage lost ALL its roof, and our house is becoming tongkang pecah as one of the neighbour's roof flew over and hit our roof, and there we have it - the rat-tat-tat sound of rain water dripping from the broken roof, seeping through the white ceiling and right onto the abundance of baldies and kain buruks all laid out on the floor. And my room is right beside the ceiling!

Home-made "I-have-no-idea-what-to-eat" chicken burger

So, there I was in the kitchen, thinking what kind of meal can I "create" so as not to waste some 10 ringgits eating out. I opened my fridge, and there it was: the frozen Ramly minced chicken that my mom bought, like, 2 weeks ago. Here's the recipe. (Mind you, we all have different taste buds so you're free to add anything that you like into the burger. EXCEPT ready made burger patty (duh~~~)
For 5-yummy-your-face-size-patty

Ingredients:-

1 packet of 500gm Ramly minced chicken
1 packet (of 5) High-5 burger bread (betui ka???)
1 medium carrot (grated)
6 cloves of garlic (finely chopped)
2 tbsp corn flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp black pepper
Butter
Other things that you like with your burger. I like cheese, tomatoes, cucumber, mayonnaise, chilly sauce, ketchup and salad.

Steps
1. Mix the minced chicken, carrot, chopped garlic.
2. Add corn flour. (You're gonna have to get your hands dirty on this one. Or else, you'll risk biting into a ball of corn flour). Mix well.
3. Add salt and black pepper to taste. Mix.
4. Now, take a handful and form it into balls, make sure you got the size right. Put in the fridge at least 10 minutes.
5. Heat a pan, slice the bun into two, butter 'em and toast on the pan.
6. Put a spoonful of butter on the pan and there goes your chicken burger patty.
7. Once the color of the patty turn golden brown, turn off the fire, and you can start arranging 'em all on your burger bun.
8. Turn on the tv, have some ice cold coffee by your left side, burger on your right side, enjoy!!!

Happy cooking!

p/s: I have my burger with some steamed vegie. Delicious!

Note to God

Note to God - Charice

If I wrote a note to God
I would speak whats in my soul
I'd ask for all the hate to be swept away,
For love to overflow

If I wrote a note to God
I'd pour my heart out on each page
I'd ask for war to endFor peace to mend this world

I'd say, I'd say, I'd say

Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love cause love is over due
And it looks like we haven't got a clue
Need some help from you

Grant us the faith to carry on
Give us hope when it seems all hope is gone
Cause it seems like so much is goin wrong
On this road we're on

If I wrote a note to God
I would say what on my mind
I'd ask for wisdom to let compassion rule this world
Until these times

If I wrote a note to God
I'd say please help us find our way
End all the bitterness, put some tenderness in our hearts

And I'd say, I'd say, I'd say

Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love cause love is over due
And it looks like we haven't got a clue
Need some help from you

Grant us the faith to carry on
Give us hope when it seems all hope is gone
Cause it seems like so much is goin wrong
On this road we're on

No, no no no
We can't do this on our own
So

Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love cause love is over due
And it looks like we haven't got a clue
Need some help from you

Grant us the faith to carry on
Give us hope when it seems all hope is gone
Cause it seems like so much is goin wrong
On this road we're on

If I wrote a note to God

Life oh life!

Life is like a piece of cream cracker.
Some like it plain, others have it with dippings.
Some dip it into coffee, others with sweet tooth prefer jam,
and some peculiar ones enjoy air sirap dippings.

p/s: I've typed and re-typed and typed and re-typed lots of things and everything seems wrong. So i'll leave you with the words above.

The point is, I live my life quite differently from others. I don't expect them to understand it, but I'd like to keep the notion of the word "privacy" much deeper than others. So, it's not YOU when I don't talk much. I just don't. I don't talk much when I'm thinking, pondering and DAYDREAMING!

Eid Mubarak

Salam Aidilfitri saya tujukan kepada semua yang membaca.

Maaf dipinta andai terkasar bahasa

Terlempang terkutuk termengata

Maaf juga kiranya saya ada ter"emo", ter"menyinga" atau ter"ape-ape je la"

Semoga Aildilfitri ini membawa seribu rahmat kepada kita semua.Amin

(tengah) hari yang indah.

oh..hari yang indah bermula dengan seorang office boy mengetuk pintu officeku pada pukul 12 tengah hari dengan beberapa keping surat.

"tolong bagi surat ni kat kawan awak tu" (die ni mmg tak brape berkenan sangat ngn member aku yg sorang tu tapi aku pedulik hape!! yang penting surat itu!!

then member aku, nor, ambik surat tu dengan sangat perlahan.

"bukak, nor! entah2 cheque!!"

dan kami buka...

dan kami ratah cheque itu (dengan mata la.gile ape nak masukkan sesuatu ke dalam rongga bulan2 puasa ni)

dan kami bergegas ke bank islam cawangan jalan sultan ismail, kuala terengganu dengan niat menunaikan cheque it.

ya..kata2 brader kat kaunter depan cimb sebulan yang lalu masih terngiang2 lagi

"kalau cek cawangan ni jer boleh cash in slallu!"

oh donia!!

dan kami tersengih2 sepanjang perjalanan sambil memikirkan apa alasan nak bagi kat student cuz lambat masuk kelas.

i'm a few thousands richer.

can't wait for the 10th of september.

lagi few thousands richer.

how's that for cikgu?

Missiez's BFF returns home!

"Hye Zura...slamat b'pose.sori kaca (kacau) mung tgh bz ni. rindu kat mu, aku trus msg ni.hehe.aku tgh packing brg2 ni.tgh kemas2 jupe plok koleksi surat2 yg mu antar kat aku dlu2.touching sey.huhu.27hb aku lek kg.hope 2 c u soon.slamat b'kerja ye.taun ni leh raye nge mu.yeay!"

I received this message on the 25th August 2009. I was shocked at first but later I learnt that my best friend, Anieza is returning home this Ramadhan and she is returning home for good.

It has been, like, what, 1 or 2 years since we met face to face? I mean, she works in Damansara before this and things has always been like this for us: either she returned home and I was in Tanjung Malim or I was home and she couldn't get a day off.

Anie has been my best friend since we were in form four. At first we were just schoolmates, and then in form two we were in the same class and I kinda forgot about her till I was sent to (read: Sent to. Cuz I initially asked for another class with different papers) form 4 as-saff. From there she turned into my best friend a.k.a spy a.k.a counselor a.k.a so many more roles.

So here we are in the present days and with that message she is like telling me the best news I have received from the past few months! I.am.excited.

So last sunday she called me and said maybe we should go out and I said yeah why not and on sunday noon she msg me saying she's already near the faculty. Off we go in her white Viva to my home so I could change my clothes and later we're all giggling like the old days.

I'm really glad she's here. I mean, Cheryl is somewhere in Ipoh and I miss having a bestie to do crazy things together! The crazy part is mine, thank you.

So we had a a lil buka puasa party with nasi kerabu takdak kuah, sate tak sedap, honey dew juice manis giler nak bagi org kencing manis, popiah ( i didn't get to taste it so no comment!) and some bubur cha cha. Oh, by the way, we had the buka puasa feast kat tepi pantai teluk ketapang. not a recommended place for singles. Damn bloody couples ramai sgt kat situ so you might get infected with the sakit-mata-tengok-org-lain-couple disease.

What can I say? After not meeting her for such a long time, it's such a relieve. To me, nobody understands me like she does. So yeah, there IS actually someone who understands me.ha.

Looking forward for more konvo raya! I hope this year I'll get to visit more friends compared to previous years.

New Life, New Perks, New Problem

dear myself,

what do you expect, zura? new life means no challenges? no problems? of course there are. problems are opportunities, sweetheart. they open up new excitement. they make you more aware of how you live your life so you'll be better each day. problems are gold mine! you just have to face everything head on, not run away like you used to do. never run away from problem. they'll catch you up someday and boy, that day won't be your best day.trust me.

so now you're being chased by your past nightmares. what are we going to do? keep running? one day you'll be xhausted running.STOP.RUNNING.NOW. start taking a close look at your life. you decide your OWN life, not the other way. nobody can change your future lest you take it in your hand and mould it with your own desire and need.

its is OK if someone receive something better than you.it is also OK when that happens even though you know you deserve better.wait, YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU DESERVE because only GOD knows whats the best for you. so stop thinking of the "what ifs" and "what's not fair" and all.nothing in this world is given to those who don't deserve it...because the final judgment is not in this world.

therefore, from now on, start thinking what HE gave YOU and not what HE gave other people.and think of what YOU CAN GIVE TO OTHERS.because when you receive rezeki from Allah, it is meant to not only you.you are bestowed with knowledge so do your best in spreading it.

if you don't do your best, nothing will work.REMEMBER that.

love,

myself.

what? you guys never do this to yourself?hypocrites la you all.heh.

of men.

hye.

long time no see.

today i have a poem which migh possibly turn me into an 80-year old virgin.

here it is!

men oh men

why do you act like an ogre

when you have a wife with hourglass figure

even though your face is like a rotten burger

and when you speak i feel like i want to vomit eggar

men oh men

does it entertain you so much

to see a young girl shiver in rush

every words you say tend to crush

and then you blame us for being harsh

and in the toilet you should really be flushed!

men oh men

out of this place i hope you fell

for all the sins you've committed well

for the only place for you is in cell

or better yet than that is hell

Happy Times

Last Saturday I had a BBQ party with my students from CS (Comp. Sci.). I had a good time being with the students, reminiscing my own past times as a student back in college. I miss my life in college, really.

I told my students to come to my office to have the BBQ instead of a park in their resident college. I didn't expect the little corner that we have in front of the office would be such a perfect place! It was cloudy but not stuffy, and I have to say, this is the first time for me to have such a good time with students (apart form the Drama Nite) since I became a lecturer.

The KEMBARA boys (Salam, Arief, Nasir, Syafiq and Syed) started the fire for BBQ loooong after we arrived. hahaha...sorry guys, but it's a fact! But we had my mother's Bihun Goreng first while waiting for the Chicken Wing. It was fabulous!

To all my students in CSD2KC:

MekLa
Azie
Pah
Salam
Najmi
Ada Kecik
Ada Tinggi
Echah
Arief
Syafiq
Farhana
Syed
Nasir
Yura
Izza
Achik
Nazrul
Che

I love you all...Good Luck!!!

Ain't over till the fat lady sings

Crrrrazzzyyyyy week!!!

SundaY
Preparing like crazy for the interview.
I attend this interview to get a raise of about RM700 from what I previously earn.
Go do practice with the person who are going to observe me doing mock teaching interview the next day.
Crazy or what?

MondaY
Wake up really early.
My name was third in the list,but when I arrived, not a single soul was there.
So much for starting at 8!!!
Waiting...waiting...waiting...
So, the Timbalan sumthing called and asked the interview to be done at 9.30.

WTF??

TodaY
Watch Korean drama and movies all day in my office.
As a revenge!
Wait, let me rephrase that, not all day, just in the morning.
I had a few students came for the extra lesson that I promised them, and also for their carried marks.

I'm having fun with work.
Something that I never expected to happen.

Also...
I guess I should give my heart another chance to be nurtured.

Oh, and that incidence with Mr Chokie-Chokie.
Stood behind me when I was about to go to my office and scared the hell out of me. Wacchaa!!! Nasib baik tak pengsan (he's not that cute.haha)

Whatever la.

Dear HEART,
Can you please stop falling for somebody who's so freakin' unreachable???

Sakit

berulang pegi toilet: rasanya dah seratus kali.

sejam = sepuluh kali.

bermula = sebelas malam semalam.

sehingga sekarang = tak berhenti, tapi dah kurang.

jumlah Oralites yang diminum = 2 peket.

jumlah Charcoal = 2 bijik.

jumlah teh keras = secawan, pahit nak mampus.

jumlah page yang berjaya di'translate' = almost six.

pening kepala = countless.

ah...i want yesterday! yesterday when i was feeling on top of the world.

now kena kensel latihan bola jaring HEA. sorry kak zam!

urgh..damn dining hall. kalau mcm ginila gayanya korang bagi makan kat budak2 U**M, memang sahla rosak kaum aku.

haram betul.i hope your cafe exploded one day, so that no other human would sakit perut like i'm having right now.

damn.

Kalam Allah.

Orang kata, kalau benda dah nak jadi, jadila.
Whatever will be, will be.

Today, out of the blue, my mum came to Dungun.

"Mok nok kelloh* nge mung la nih, bawok lauk sutong goreng pedas. Ya* gi la beli nasik." she said over the phone. (Kelloh = berkelah/picnic, Ya = nama manja, only closest family address me with that nickname)

Mak oh mak. I've just finished marking 3 out of 75 of my students' essays.

"Marilah. (Come-lah!)" Ape lagi nak cakap? She didn't come here for nothing anyways, she drove an hour and a half just to deliver me a letter from ITNMB.

Few weeks ago I sent an application to Institut Terjemahan Negara Malaysia Berhad for a translation project. After an email confirming my application, a bulk of letter came containing a letter (duh~~) and a six-page English text, waiting to be translated into Malay. A Test. Interesting.

Today, mother opened the letter on my behalf and called me, along with that message about picnic with her youngest daughter. (I never really agreed on this you're-not-home-so-I-open-your-letter-thing but what the heck. As long as it's not from a vampire or something. Must be written in blood eh?)

I.Am.Excited.

I don't know why or how did translation becomes a passion, but it does work to relieve some tension, plus that extra money for occasional trips to shopping mall!

So here I am, trying to perah this rusted brain for some ideas on putting forward the language skill that I have. (Read: SKILL~~)

Mak oh Mak. What would I do without you? An hour and a half drive from KT to Dungun for a job that I might (or might not) have?

When I was just a little girl,
I asked my mother what would I be,
Will I be pretty, will I be rich,
That's what she said to me.

Que sera sera,
Whatever will be, will be,
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera sera,
What will be, will be.

cermin.

5.45 am
woke up, look at the mirror and asked myself this question:
is this really me i'm seeing?
where has that old spiritful me gone to?
comb my hair and sigh *its long now, long enough to tie in a bun*
showered, get dressed, and go to work

7.00 am
yeah, that's how early i get to work today
just to help a friend who's going to be evaluated by her senior
why evaluate when we know she's good at what she does???

8.00am
get to class.my students are all in a bad mood today.lost in a drama competition
its ok, darlings. its our first.everything has to go through that "first time" thing
no sweat.

10.00am
go to kfc.dam stupid manager wont let us in even though its 5 minutes to 10.30. neva mind
"lets go to pizza hut" said a friend
oh rite, PH opened at 11am
sat in the car and wait

now.1.35pm
hanging around at her house
no, we're not skipping work
no more class today
just taking a bit of rest from an unrestful weekend

and still can't get my mind off HIM.

what doesn't kill you...

Aha…three posts in a day. Seems like I have a lot to say. Actually, I do. I have a million things to say to this one person. And what I want to say can be found in these songs:

1. Whitney Houston - I will always love you
2. Leona Lewis – Better in time
3. Katy Perry – Thinking of you
4. Mariah Carey – Always be my baby
5. Ramlah Ram – Ketentuan

That’s it. I am currently speechless. I mean, when I decided to be honest with my own feelings, I didn’t expect the outcome to be this bad. Not THIS bad. I didn’t expect to be feeling so devastated and the feeling of nothingness keeps creeping back at me.

I guess the sadness will go away with time. But I don’t think I could ever forget him. Not ever.

But if forgetting him means that I would learn to find myself again amidst the confusion, maybe I should try it.

Forget him.

Maybe.

Hati dia

Tulisan ini

Untuk dia

Bukan untuk orang lain

Kerana yang punya hati itu

Hati dia

Bukan hati orang lain

Yang aku sayang

Sayang dia

Bukan orang lain

Yang terluka

Hati aku

Bukan hati orang lain

Aku pilih dia

Bukan orang lain

Kerana yang mengerti

Hanya dia

Bukan orang lain

Yang menemaniku

Dia

Bukan orang lain

Yang selama ini aku tunggu

Dia

Bukan orang lain

Tapi

Aku bukan pilihan dia

Orang lain

Pilihan dia.

Growing Up

"Growing up is not all about making the right decision, it is also about living with the decision that you've made"

Strangely, I got this saying from the "Ugly Betty" series. Ha.

I think I've grown up enough to make decisions.

I guess I'm not that grown up yet.

Letting go of the offer that came my way makes me uncomfortable and jumpy.

Then I heard Betty's father saying the above words.

I guess I have to live with my decision.

Come what may, I'll stick with it. Live with it. And Bare with it.

COME WHAT MAY...

The Working Thing

Now i'm sitting in one of the computer labs in my workplace.

Sometimes I wonder whether I am really meant for this job.

Currently, only me and Cheryl are working.

One of us is doing her MA.

I guess money didnt matter to her because she's filthy rich.

ME?

I dunno.

I received the KPM letter last week.

Mom has been bugging me, asking me to go for the interview.

I decided to stay put and think.

Should I do my master this July?

Or should I wait for a year?

My instinct never betrays me.

And this time it says "Take a year to get used to your work. Then apply for fellowship."

Thats what it says.

I don't know whether it's the instinct or the urge to oppose everyone's opinion.

You see...I don't really care about what people say. Especially when I don't ask for your oppinion goddammit!

Recently, my ears were stuck with some lame opinions from the people who aren't worth it.

I really hope that this person will learn someday that you don't have to ALWAYS tell people your two cents worth of opinion.

thats all for today.some other lecturer ius going to use this room.ciao

Waacky Birthday Gal

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WACKY GURL. you can read her blog here.

aunty wish you all the happiness and wackiness in the world.

hope you have a wonderful array of boyfriends...

hahahahaha...



if only the guys that i like are not liar, double-sided, muka kuali and, well..liar..

meanwhile...get the book.

awesome!

i'm juggling between "the kite runner" and "i'm in no mood for love"

pretty exhausted trying to read two books at once...

but hey...life's a bed of books..

so read and be-read!!!

Ape Dah Jadi...?

aku pakai ubat gigi colgate, pencuci muka loreal, henpon nokia, suka makan kat kfc, mcD jarang2 skali, tengok muvie omputeh, pastu pakai pc yang ada cip intel.

kalo camtu bleh panggil aku zionis ke?

kalau aku tau colgate tu bagi untung kat israel, takdela plak aku nak pakai colgate semenjak 20 tahun yang lalu.

dah pencuci muka loreal tu elok, aku beli la. dulu2 mase pakai safi balqis takde elok mcm tu.lagi naik jerawat ade.abis tu nk try Felisa Kosmetik ke?

dan henpon nokia tu mak aku bagi adiah.

logik sikit la fikir.kalau betul nak boikot, pasal ape bagi barang tu masuk Malaysia?

ape Israel baru jadi jahat dua tiga bulan lepas ke?

time dulu2 tak sedor plak ye.

ape2 je la.

HUWARGHHHHH!!!!

Seven Common Dreams and What They Mean

This article can be found here: http://www.divinecaroline.com/article/22201/53010-seven-common-dreams-mean

Dreams come to us in our most private moments: wrapped up in sheets, our public faces stored away for the night. The visions we see in sleep are supposed to be expressions of our individual psyches and imaginations, but most people’s dreams are based on themes that are very common. I thought my recurring dream of losing my teeth was scary and freakish until I went online to find thousands of others having the same dream, all trying to find out what the heck it could mean. Just because our dreams are shared, though, doesn’t mean they aren’t unique; the way we experience these common elements in dreaming life is what’s significant.

1. Being chased.

Candice Janco, author of the Bedside Dream Dictionary: 500 Dream Symbols and Their Meanings, describes this dream (the most common) as an indication of a felt threat in your waking life. This threat can take the form of a menacing person or a strong emotion with which you are having difficulty coping. Try to determine who or what is chasing you, where the dream takes place, and what your feelings are during the chase to understand what this dreams means to you.

2. Missing an important event because you are late.

This can indicate regret over a missed opportunity, inability to make a connection, or desire to pull oneself together. In Dream Power: How to Use Your Night Dreams to Change Your Life, Cynthia Richmond suggests asking questions of dreams in order to understand what this common symbol means to you. For example: What are you missing? Who is disappointed by the missed event? Is it only you or are there others involved?

3. Finding yourself at work or school naked.

Not surprisingly, Freud interpreted dreams about being naked as repressed sexual wishes. But the most important part of this dream is the feelings that are involved. You suddenly find yourself exposed, vulnerable, and awkward. What area of your life corresponds to that feeling? Figure this out by noting where you are, who notices you, what part of you is exposed, how people react to you, and how you yourself react to the situation.

4. Falling.

Falling indicates feelings of insecurity and lack of support. What situation have you “fallen into?” Who has “let you down?” Perhaps not surprisingly, this particular dream is most common among professional men and women. The Illustrated Dream Dictionary authors Russell Grant and Vicky Emptage note the close relationship between “falling” and “failing.” They also note that the dream’s meaning is probably not so clear-cut. Grant and Emptage ascribe dreams of falling to feelings of isolation, the sense of being without the support and affection that success cannot provide.

5. Flying.

Interestingly, Grant and Emptage interpret flying dreams as boasting about sexual powers. The important part of the dream is how you are flying; since the flying itself represents your ambitions, are you flying successfully, or trying and failing to fly as high as possible? From there, they make the leap to feelings of sexual inadequacy, but such feelings of low self-esteem could cover inadequacy of any kind, not just sexual.

6. Losing your teeth.

This theme has a number of potential meanings because of the very different significances teeth have to different people. Our teeth are representative of our appearance because our smiles are one of the first things people notice about us. Therefore, dreaming about losing your teeth can indicate insecurity about your appearance, or even fears of sexual impotence, as teeth are often used to flirt with a desired partner. We also use our teeth to bite, chew, and tear, so losing them can mean a loss of power or fear of getting old. Interestingly, this dream is most common among menopausal women, perhaps for all of the above reasons.

7. Snakes.

Snakes have been a fear in dreams for quite some time. The ancient Egyptians used to make snakes out of clay and place them at the doors of their homes to frighten away nightmares, believing that snakes were bringers of bad dreams and that the clay snake would keep real ones away. Dreammoods, an online encyclopedia of dream meanings, reports that snakes signify some hidden threat. This makes sense, as most of us fear the “snake in the grass.” Like most other symbols, though, this one has many meanings that depend on context. Snakes shed their skin, so they may signify renewal and transformation. This may be a frightening experience, as most people are uncomfortable with change, or it may be very positive.

In all of our dreams, the true meanings emerge when we decide what they really mean to us. Though these dream symbols are shared among many, and we can determine general explanations for them, it is the context in which we place them that is significant. Read all you can about dream meanings to find information that may be relevant to you, but also ask questions about your dreams and how these symbols make you feel. Once you dig a little deeper, you may find answers and clarity.



From all of the types of dreams, I had number 1,3,4 and 5 the most. I wonder why.
What do you all think?

A New Year, A New Beginning

yeah yeah I know it's lame! but things have changed a lot since I have last updated.

First, I am no longer a jobless fresh graduate.

Second, I have my own office!

Hahaha...even tho kena kongsi 3 orang, but hey...still an office nevertheless!

Third, I have moved to the place where I have to work.
and lastly...

Um..I wanna thank a lot of people who have been very patient dealing with me and my sick mood. But I just want you guys to know that after I did what I've done, usually I'd go home and ponder about it for days.

So yeah I do still have regrets and I usually don't forget about it so soon.
Sorry if I ever make anybody feel mad or angry of freaking pissed but I think I always (I think, OK??) apologize.

Except for when I don't want to because I know I am not guilty.

Anyways I hope you guys have a wonderful year ahead.

This thing that I have, it's not much. But hey...it's MINE.
......

so thats it for update.enjoy life, guys!